• Jasmine Bailey

Who gives speeches at a wedding?

Updated: Apr 2, 2019

Ah the speeches. Now this can really go so many ways but here are a few general ideas of who gives speeches and what they talk about.

To start the typical order is:

  1. Father of the bride

  2. Groom (and Bride)

  3. Maid of honor

  4. Best man (always last)

Father of the bride

Traditionally the father of the bride gives the first speech. This was initially the case because the brides family traditionally paid for the wedding. Being a modern era where costs are often shared, it may be the case that a member from each family wants to give a contribution.

This speech would include:

  • Welcome the guests and thank them for attending

  • Welcome the groom to the family

  • Mention absent family members and read out any messages sent by them

  • Give the bride a few compliments, discuss sentimental memories with her and confirm how proud you are

  • Compliment the groom and the compatibility of the newly married couple

  • Toast the newly married couple

Groom (and Bride)

Now traditionally this is a speech given by the groom. But I’m a modern woman who likes breaking the rules so I stood up with my husband. (Find out more about the rules I broke here: ). It’s also becoming more common for brides to give their own speech but seeing as the day is about the union of the bride and groom, I find the symbolism of the bride and groom giving a combined, almost conversational style, speech way more relatable and true to the day.

Our speech included:

  • A response to my dads toast

  • Thanking the guests for attending and their gifts, giving special mention to those who have traveled from far

  • Thanking both the bride and grooms parents

  • The groom should compliment his bride

  • The bride should compliment her groom

  • Give thank you gifts to the main wedding participants (my husband and I did this in the morning of the wedding)

  • The groom and bride compliment the groomsmen and bridesmaids

  • The couple toast their parents

Maid Of Honor

Now I actually didn’t have one. Find out how that happened here: The wedding rules I broke on my wedding day

So I gave this honor to my bridesmaids and let them figure out the details. They ended up choosing the best speaker of the three of them and the other two stood there for moral support.

Their speech included:

  • Telling a (complementary) story about the bride and the couple

  • Compliment the groomsmen

  • Toast to the newly weds

Best Man

We followed tradition here and my husbands best man gave his speech.

His speech included:

  • A bit of good humor joking about the groomsmen

  • A compliment for the bridesmaids

  • A compliment to the couple, especially the bride

  • Some fond memories with the groom in good humor

  • Reading out messages from absent family and friends on the grooms side

  • A final toast to the bride and groom

As I mentioned I’m not one for following rules too strictly. If your husband is uncomfortable with public speaking, you do it. If your mom has a lot of family there and wants to say something, let her. Your wedding is about everyone having fun and being comfortable.



British Columbia, Canada

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